You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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