Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
We smell like vodka and hangover
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
Randomize
