he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
You ever have a fart follow you around?
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