how can u be prego again
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Randomize
