Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
Randomize
