I hate your face
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
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