This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
That's the last time you call me to prove to some girl at a bar that you're English. It's bad enough that you actually get to fuck them because of it without having to wake me up to seal the deal.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
Randomize
