its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
Randomize
