No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
well most of my day revolves around power hour
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
Randomize
