the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
dude i'm inner monologue high
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
He's a Shit stain on my heart
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Randomize
