You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
Pants are for mortals
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Randomize
