I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize
