Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
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