If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
No stitches, just platelets and will power
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Randomize
