Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
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