I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
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