If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
I think a kid would responsible me up
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
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