between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
no. you can't hotbox the world.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Randomize
