clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize