i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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