Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
Randomize
