"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
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