you turned your livingroom into a bong?
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
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