How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Shitshow foam night was such a success
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
Randomize
