it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
