We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Randomize