just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
Randomize
