Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
Randomize