if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
Randomize
