if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
It's never too late to be topless.
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
