If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Randomize
