Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
Randomize
