Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
You called yourself Captain Aspirin and then tried to cure my headache by shoving pills up my nose. Fuck you becoming a nurse, you can't take care of me while you're drunk ever again. Ever.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
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