Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
