This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
