White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
Randomize
