he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
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