hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
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