i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
a search helicopter?!
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Randomize