never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
