I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Randomize
