i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
He did a backflip because drugs
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