its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
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