yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
Randomize