Just fell off a train. Bad.
Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
Randomize
