That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
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