you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
I can't put those talents on a resume
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Randomize
