im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
Randomize