have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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