my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
