note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
